Maybe Baby
by Alidiabin
Summary: Salim Ulman took one more thing from Ziva.
1. Chapter 1

**Title: **Maybe Baby**  
Fandom: **NCIS**  
Author: **Alidiabin**  
Words: **963**  
Disclaimer: **I own nothing**  
Warnings/ Spoilers: **general S7**  
Parings:** none.**  
Summary: **Salim Ulman took one more thing from Ziva.

**Maybe Baby**

The major case response team did not like cases involving children. Gibbs for obvious reasons, he had buried one. The other members of the team did not like those cases either though for less concrete reasons. McGee just did not like the thought of the venerable child. For Tony the cases reminded him of the less fun aspects of his childhood with senior. Ziva disliked child cases because she was taunted with what she would never have.

They arrived at a crime scene in a small town, a marine on maternity leave. The small town and rather chauvinistic sheriff and has had very little experience with a baby. So the bawling crying mess of six week old baby boy is thrust into Ziva's unwilling yet welcoming olive skinned arms.  
"Just because I am a woman" Ziva uttered beginning a familiar rant to her colleagues.  
"Doesn't mean you have to look after the kid" Palmer added. Ziva shot him an angry look.

Ziva paced the small hallway. Holding the wailing infant. She rested his head on her shoulder.  
"Ssh" she whispered trying to sooth the infant. She rubbed his back and tried to coax the infant into sleep. She felt sorry for the poor thing, his mother was dead and he would never remember her.

The social worker let a smile cross her aged face as she saw Ziva holding the sleeping baby.  
"How many do you have?" the social worker asked as she slowly teased the baby from Ziva's embrace.  
"None" Ziva uttered, as the child was settled into a carrier.  
"None yet" the social worker said with a smile on her face. "You'll be a natural" Ziva watched as the child was taken away. She touched the shoulder where he had just rested.  
"None ever" she whispered as she turned back to the crime scene.

Salim Ulman had unknowingly taken her ability to reproduce from her, either him or one of the men he allowed to use her body in the most disgusting way possible, had given an STI. That STI combined with the nutrient deficiency from living on dirty water and very little food for nine weeks had destroyed her fertility.

_She remembered the day the doctor told her.  
"Ziva" Doctor Sadie Roan stood in front of Ziva, with an open manila folder. Ziva looked up at the brown haired woman. "I don't really know how to tell you this"  
"Spit it down" Ziva said mixing up her idioms, due to the fear suddenly pulsing through her body.  
"The nutrient deficiency and STI have led to you seriously hindered your fertility" Sadie said softly. Her hand touched Ziva's in comfort.  
"It is that it" she lied trying to hide the sadness that suddenly crept through her body. _

She had not really thought about it since she had spent the afternoon crying. She had never been one hundred per cent children she wanted children, but the option had been taken away. She no longer had a choice.

Gibbs told Tony and Ziva to ride back to NCIS together. Ziva found that the Gods were taunting her; all she saw were images of children. The billboard they were sitting in front of in the unmoving traffic of DC had a diaper advert on it. The car in front contained two children, boys Ziva assumed as she was only able to see the top half of the back of two heads. The car behind also contained a child, Ziva could see the baby carrier through the mirror.  
"Ziva" Tony said interrupting her musings. "You ok?" he asked. "Well obviously not you've been weird since you held that baby. Are you getting clucky?" Tony babbled.  
"No" Ziva said in a quiet voice. "I just do not like being confronted with what I will never have"  
"What?" Tony asked confused. Ziva expected nothing less; though Tony was a former playboy he had little knowledge of women's health issues.  
"I cannot have children" Ziva uttered looking out the window at the wire fence on the highway. "I got an infection, it is cleared up but I cannot have children" Ziva uttered not willing to explain how she ended up with an STI.  
"You could adopt" Tony replied, thinking of celebrities and one of his frat brothers who had adopted a kid a few years back.  
"Yes" she uttered sarcastically, trying to hide the fact she had indeed looked into adoption the weekend after doctor Roan's revelation "because some adoption agency would really give me a baby" she spoke with a bitter tone remembering that afternoon in her apartment where she realised she would not be able to adopt either. "I am a single woman, who only recently became an American citizen. I have a dangerous job, an emotionally traumatic past and no extended family" Tony looked at her. She understood the flicker of pain in his eyes. "No legal extended family. I love all of you as my family but according to the law you are just my friends" Ziva paused and took a deep breath that seemed to calm her. "Perhaps it is just not meant to be after all I did spend nearly a decade of my life killing people, maybe it means I do not get to create life or even help mould a life already created"

While she spoke a fresh wave of self-pity washed over her, as Tony navigated the highway traffic with ease.  
"I should probably count out marriage to" Ziva uttered as traffic finally begun to move. She could hear Tony's unspoken why "No one would want to spend forever with someone who cannot give them kids" she said.  
"There you are wrong" Tony whispered as the traffic begun to flow. He had never really wanted kids anyway he thought.

**A/N:** this is what watching an episode of 'Private Practice' does to my muse. I'd like to go all 'Boston Legal' and sue 'Private Practice' for getting me involved in some baby storyline (I cried for gods' sake) despite my strong dislike of children and desire to live a life of childfree freedom until the day I die.

Please review.


	2. Chapter 2

**Title: **Maybe Baby Part II**  
Fandom: **NCIS**  
Author: **Alidiabin**  
Words: **1,017**  
Disclaimer: **I own nothing**  
Warnings/ Spoilers: ** general **  
Parings:** Tony/Ziva  
**Summary: **Amira Franks visits an older Ziva.

_**Maybe Baby Part II**_

Amira Franks stood in front of the 'DiNozzo' apartment. The DiNozzo of the apartment had died a couple of years ago, a week out from retiring from NCIS. It was now occupied by Ziva David his very long-term girlfriend. They had never married as they had only had bad examples of such unions including her parents, his father and his many wives and Gibbs. They had however gotten tiny tattoos on their ring fingers, the symbol of infinity.

"Auntie Ziva" Amira called. Her husband Kyle looked up even after five years of marriage and ten years together Amira's pseudo family still surprised him, for they were much more loving than Kyle's family that were all biologically related. Amira and Kyle's one year old son Liam made his presence known as he woke from his nap.

Ziva was of no relation to Amira, but she had called her Auntie since she could remember. Ziva and Amira's mother Leyla had formed a friendship due to them both being immigrants from countries torn apart by war and despite their opposing religions. When Amira, her mother and grandfather had moved to Stillwater after an incident only known as the 'Reynosa Incident' in which Mike's house had burnt down and Mike had lost a finger. Ziva, Gibbs and the other members of the pseudo family often visited Stillwater. The people of Stillwater always looked surprised when they saw Amira run up to a woman with a Star of David crying 'Auntie', they were only slightly surprised when Amira called the rest of the people including a Goth Auntie and Uncle.

Ziva was now all the family Amira had left except for her husband and son. Old age killed Jackson, Mike and Amiras' grandmother Shada. Gibbs like DiNozzo died a week out from retirement. McGee was still alive technically, in an old folk's home delusional for he was struck by the same terrible disease that killed Ducky's mother. Amira knew Ziva visited him once a week and they recalled cases from when Ziva was a mossad liaison officer. Accidents had taken Jimmy and Abby, before their time.

Ziva answered the door, a huge smile crossed her face as she realised who was visiting her.  
"Amira, Kyle, Liam" Ziva uttered her elderly face lighting up, she look Liam into her arms. Ziva had always been good with children; Amira had always wondered why she never had her own. Leyla had explained it once, when Amira had hit puberty that Ziva could not have children of her own, she was almost completely infertile.

_Amira remembered a little boy named Joel who Ziva looked after, for a few months when Amira was about ten. Mike had explained the American foster system to Amira, and that the little boy was the son of a dead Marine and that Ziva was looking after him until they found a guardian. The boy had disappeared from Ziva's side as quickly as he had appeared. _

_At the 'family dinner' the weekend after he left, Ziva had been quiet and drunk too much. Tony had shot her concerned glances. So had the rest of them but Tony's were more obvious.  
"Stop it" Ziva hissed in Tony's direction. "I am allowed to have a drink"  
"Ziva" Tony said quietly and calmly. "It's all right to be upset about Joel" Ziva took another sip of wine.  
"I should not have gotten attached" Ziva uttered as she looked at her empty wine glass. "He was always going to leave" Tony got up and moved across Jackson's dinning room to her side. "I should not have signed myself up." His arms wrapped around Ziva. He whispered soothing words to her. Amira watched as Tony led Ziva from the table. They heard sobbing and Tony trying to sooth her from the hallway. The next week they had both appeared with their new tattoos. _

Amira sat down and watched as Ziva played with Liam. Both Liam and Ziva were having a lot of fun.  
"Oh you are so precious" Ziva uttered into the one year olds ear as she sung him a song and he clapped his hands. The quiet room was suddenly polluted with beeping and cell phones ringing. Minor swearwords were uttered which caused Ziva to cover little Liam's ears.  
"I have a case" Amira said, she was the lead field agent of NCIS' Major Case team.  
"I have to go into work" Kyle uttered as her checked his beeper "Major train crash" the surgeon uttered. Liam was completely oblivious to his parents and much more interested in Ziva's Star of David. He wrapped the silver chain around his finger.  
"Liam" both parents uttered in unison both wondering what to do with their son. Ziva was playing with little Liam.  
"I will take him" Ziva uttered as she bounced him on her knee.

Amira let herself into Ziva's apartment later that night. The case had been bad; there was a bloodbath with a marine wife killed along with her lover. The husband had quickly admitted it. Amira looked around the shadowy apartment for Ziva and Liam. The coffee table was covered in pizza crust and other mess probably from Liam. Amira noticed the open door to Ziva's bedroom. Ziva was half asleep with Liam on the other side of the bed.  
"Thank you" Amira whispered as she sat on Ziva's bed.  
"What for?" Ziva asked. "The pleasure was all mine" there was silence as Amira ran her hand across Liam's dark curly hair.  
"Are you sad you never had kids?" Amira asked her eyes focused on Liam. Ziva shook her head.  
"I used to be, but I was a part of lots of children's lives" Ziva said a smile crossed her face as she thought of Joel and looked at Amira and Liam. "I like seeing happy children it does not matter if they are mine or not" She looked at Liam as he slept and smiled, she had never had a child of her own, but watching Amira with little Liam was priceless and something she would not trade for ten of her own children.

**A/N:** I know some people asked for a sequel. So here we go folks. A semi happy ending. Reviews please.


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